It's a THEM problem.
We don't need less rage. We need way the fuck more.
Please remember that a lot of the time it literally is a Them Problem.
Not a “wound that needs healing”.
Not a “lesson that needs integrating”.
Not an “opportunity to stay calm and take the High Road™️”.
A lot of the time, people really are just shitty, and getting fkn mad at them is the most “integrated” thing to do.
Women + femmes are fkn bombarded on all sides with conditioning that our rage is shameful, dangerous, not permissible, never ever to be trusted.
(Which makes us easy marks for colonial patriarchy, ofc)
Add to that this ~new age~ bullshit idea that anger is “less enlightened” somehow, and that every single instance where we feel wronged is really a “wound that you need to heal”…
…and we end up passively biting our tongues in the face of abuse and subjugation, thinking we have the moral and spiritual high ground.
It’s so embarrassingly obvious sometimes that the vast majority of “new age” and “self help” shit was written by, and for, yt men.
Because yea, if you’ve been socialised into thinking you’re the centre of the universe…
…and that yours is the only experience that matters…
…hearing axioms like “your anger is showing you where you need to do your Inner Work” might make you less of an insufferable asshat.
But, if your life is the culmination of 5000+ years of indoctrinated subservience, drenched to the bone with conditioning that your worth comes from your “niceness” and “politeness”…
…then yet more conditioning that your anger is gross and shameful - now with a fresh splash of moral righteousness - will only ever rob you of yet more of your agency and power.
Women + femmes don’t need less rage.
We need waaaaaay the fuck more.
How many of us have stayed in shitty relationships for way too fkn long because we assumed that our anger was the problem, and not the violations of boundaries that precipitated it? (I have, cringe)
How many of us have let shit slide when we could have spat fire because “if I were more regulated, this wouldn’t bother me - I should work on that”? (🙋♀️)
Do you see that we’re socialised into pathologising our anger at being violated - instead of the violation itself?
Do you see that as we habitually pathologise ourselves FIRST on an individual, relational level, we then naturally pathologise ourselves first on a collective, systemic level?
Do you see that the indoctrination to let shit slide with that patriarchal man in your kitchen when you were 18… teaches you to let shit slide with the patriarchal systems destroying our planet?
A fun experiment: assume it’s their fault.
Just try it on.
Whenever you get mad at someone, for literally any reason, assume you’re 100% in the right and they fucked up.
Break the habit of default-assuming it’s a you problem.
Just for a bit, make it a Them problem.
Feel your anger starting to solidify as you rewrite the conditioning that your reaction to a violation of boundaries is more offensive than the violation itself.
There’s so much power here.
(And aside from the fact that this is urgent work for revolution reasons, you’ll be waaaaaay less tired 🙃)
Women + femmes: we need your rage.
We need to be cultivating more intimacy with our anger and our primal instincts.
Your anger is not wrong, or shameful, or untrustworthy, or the problem. That’s a colonial lie to keep us buying into our powerlessness in the face of our own subjugation.
Your anger will free us. ⚔️❤️
⚔️⚔️ MOST OF THE TIME IT *LITERALLY IS* A THEM PROBLEM. ⚔️⚔️
PS~ want a couple weeks of dedicated space for exploring your relationship to your RAGE in the interests of all our liberation?
This lunar cycle is all about the Dark Mother.
Lesson topics this month include…
…rage reclamation…
…reconnecting with clarity and decisiveness…
…setting (and HOLDING) boundaries…
…reconnection with the primal NO in our bones…
…and fully reanimating our premenstrual phase (the great teacher of Dark Mother embodiment 🔥🍂⚔️)
Apply now by clicking through the button below. Eight spots left this month, if one’s yours, do the thing~